“I AM SO EMOTIONAL…”
“When emotions arise such as sadness or anger, I feel stuck for quite a while. Sometimes I feel out of control and cannot get out of it, no matter what.”
Emotions come and go and one cannot dismiss them nor control their creation. The same way one cannot control the wind from blowing or the clouds moving in the sky. They just are.
When you experience pleasant circumstances, happy feelings usually arise. At these times, you do not question or wonder about it because all is well.
On the other hand, when more challenging events occur or something triggers a difficult memory or yet, someone pushes your buttons, other types of emotions such as anger, intolerance, sadness etc. may arise. These feelings create a total different experience which may become uncomfortable not to say unbearable. You wish for those to vanish, to leave you alone.
So, you may either try to convince yourself there is no reason for that. Or you may find very good justifications for what happened or try to understand why. If you are not successful, you may try to change your mind by starting an activity, turn the television on or use any other devices to ease that discomfort. Still, it does not work and you start even feeling anxious about what goes on.
So what to do?
From my own experience and the sharing of some other people who have tried it, a very effective way to handle these emotions before they cause too much upset, is to ALLOW them, STAY with them and GIVE them the inner space required, LONG ENOUGH, so they can eventually dissolve.
HOW TO DO THAT?
FIRST, by acknowledging to yourself what you are truly feeling (instead of denying, justifying, ignoring or blaming).
SECOND, by localizing in the body where you feel it (neck, shoulders, stomach, etc.).
THIRD, by stepping back from yourself and from these experiences and giving space and permission for this experience to occur (instead of trying to push it away, change it, judging etc.)
FINALLY, WAIT, WAIT, WAIT……and wait some more and as long as necessary. This process may be temporarily uncomfortable but so what? So is going to the dentist for some people. And this too shall pass, as a Buddha use to say.
Do not run away from it, do not use your old tricks. Live it! Someone said “Insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results.” By doing so, you will magically feel the hold and discomfort being released and dissolved. And what a relief! Just like a tight fist held so tight, you feel the circulation stopping…and then, the fist opens up and you feel life running through your hand.
And you did nothing, except being the witness of this experience.
Try it! It works! Then you may go on and enjoy your day and people around you!
Let me know how you do…
A support for dealing with emotions, witnessing and relaxation, is also to be found in our tree flower essences designed for emotional well being! To learn more about the natural healing power of trees and to try our tree flower essences visit us at www.essences.ca
Celine Cloutier (aka Ma Sunder Gulabo)