It’s an odd problem for a lawyer, but what if the ‘time is money’ thing is not the problem? Rather, the problem for some is surviving the cutbacks and being in the office with nothing to do. What looks worse for a lawyer – a poor billing record or being there with time on his/her hands?

AbovetheLaw publisher David Lat has written the seven suggestions for how to kill your time, while hopefully taking care of the billable hour as well. They range from email checking (the ‘low hanging fruit’) to writing a book and . . dare we comment? . . “pleasuring yourself”.

Here’s the Lat List:

1. Clean up your desk or office.

This is the low-hanging fruit. After that trial ends or that deal closes, you can do something about this:

2. Catch up on your email.

This is the virtual version of office cleaning (except more important; mistresses probably aren’t leaving lipstick-covered redwelds in your office, but it’s always good to delete “I’m free tonight” emails from “glitternipples224@gmail.com”). With enough time and effort, maybe you can finally hit inbox zero.

(My Above the Law inbox currently contains 14,868 emails, of which 8,225 are unread. If I owe you an email response, I apologize; unfortunately, due to the volume of mail I receive, I can’t respond to all or even most messages. My personal Gmail inbox is a bit better — 132 emails, 11 of them unread — but it’s still over my goal of no more than 100 at any given time.)

3. Do some online shopping.

Everyone does it (not just secretaries, a longstanding stereotype). It’s already October, so you might as well get an early start on your holiday shopping. But since you’re on your firm computer, wait until you get home to order that vibrator. Instead, why not buy something from our friends at Bonobos (affiliate link)?

4. Do some online dating.

Think of this as online shopping too, except for people instead of things. Your demanding legal job doesn’t give you much time to hit the bars, so you might as well go digital. Personally I’m a fan of OkCupid, which is how I met my significant other of several years, but you might also try eHarmony, the folks who brought us the 15 stupid reasons to date a lawyer.