“How Are The Kids Doing?” People Will Ask You.
If you have teens you may feel like you are in foreign territory as if we have completely forgotten our own teen times. Few of us say, we would love to live it again, but if we did we would want the confidence and knowledge we now have gained. Take a moment to recall how you felt being in your teens. Get reacquainted with the transition, the feelings, the awkwardness, the sensitivity, the dreams, the discouragement, the doubt, maybe first love and the whole range of emotions related to that stage. How did you feel? Do you recall beautiful and exciting moments as well? How would you like to have been treated or spoken to? What did you find the most difficult? What had you wished?
Some cultures celebrate the transition into teens, but mostly in modern culture we don’t have any specific rites. One example is in the Jewish tradition where at the age of 13 there is a coming of age ceremony know as a Bar Mitzvah for boys or a Bat Mitzvah for girls. These rites recognize that the young person is beginning to experience the greater complexity of life and beginning to assume certain individual, spiritual and community responsibilities.
Teens for girls means the beginning of womanhood, changes in the body, opening of other interests such as boys, outings with friends and even earning some money to gain some independence from parents.
For boys, it seems like the teen transition comes a little later, but as we know, they soon catch up!!!
Our interest here is how we can all gracefully live this transition together, both parents and teens. For some parents, the question is how will we survive this transition? And for some teens, they may ask themselves the same question.
I asked my 20 years old son to give me a few tips about how parents can help their teens, so how we can all go through this stage smoothly and healthily. Now I am very grateful since my son and I went thought the TEENS together smoothly and joyfully. That is why I felt I could ask HIS advice on the subject.
His first statement was that “all teens are so different and there is no specific list for quick recipes of success. Even if there is an obvious hormonal change during that period, not all teens will act and react in the same manner. It is not just about a specific time of changes which will make it more difficult. It is about a whole package of events as well.’’
I remember that when my son turned into a teenager, we felt we should probably create a TEEN tree flower essence for natural energy healing.
We had created the Children’s Happy Helping Potion, to help children with feelings of abandonment and bringing reassurance and comfort. We had created the Therapist and Healer Essence to bring energetic protection for those working with people and then we saw that a Teen Essence would be useful as well as my own son was starting high school.
The Teen Essence is about riding the waves of change, a metaphor from the sport of surfing. It is designed to help teens regain equilibrium, to even out moods and to better cope with the intensity of personal change. The emotionally beneficial qualities of trees via energy healing in the form of a tree flower essence would be a great support for teens!
How as parents can we help our teens? Here are a few pointers from my son that make a lot of sense to me:
“Remember the obvious age difference between parents and teens
Remember about liberty and a chance to learn by ourselves
Remember finally to really listen when your child speaks to you.”
Not too complicated I’d say.
This stage of life is an amazing one, for us all to learn about each other, about changes and about getting along. Good communication, openness and trust, plus, if I may add, a good sense of humor remains, are all important. Remembering our own teen times is also helpful.
After using the Teen Essence for several years, and riding nicely the waves, my son one day graduated to the Being a Man Essence and is now living this new stage of life….
How wonderful to see them grow and flourish. Now when we talk, we can speak of those teen years and laugh and hopefully he can pass on these thoughts along to his own teen if that is his path.
To your teens,
Celine Cloutier aka (Gulabo)
Gulabo is co-creator of Canadian Forest Tree Essences (www.essences.ca) and works as an Emotional Health Consultant dealing with such important issues as stress, insomnia, depression, conflict resolution, mediation and weight loss.
[email protected] or tel. 888-410-432 to speak to Gulabo or to make an appointment for a consultation.